At Home with Lorraine Kelly 2013 - (Page 66)
Happiness is a
glass half-empty
A regular dose of pessimism might just be what the doctor ordered.
Find out why it doesn’t always pay to look on the bright side of life…
The study in America involved two
groups of managers; one group that
was trained in the technique of
mental contrasting and another that
{ {
relax
Telling yourself you ‘must’
do this or you ‘should’ do
that will only lead to guilt
and frustration. You’ll just be
setting yourself up for
major disappointment
wasn’t. Two weeks after the trial
period, the researchers found that
those who had learned the mental
contrasting technique had achieved
more of their goals than those who
hadn’t had the training.
The study also discovered that those
individuals who were overly optimistic
turned out to be counterproductive
– they tended to visualise their aims as
already achieved but, in fact this gave
them a false sense of security as the
task had not yet been completed.
This recent research backs up
results of another study, explained by
neuroscientist, Tali Sharot in her
book The Optimum Bias: A Tour of the
Irrationally Positive Brain (prices vary,
Pantheon). Non-depressed people
generally have a less accurate and
overly optimistic view of their true
ability to influence events than those
who are suffering with depression.
Turning negativity on its head
Achieve your goals in life – no matter how big or small – by anticipating the worst straightaway
There needs to be a fine line between ‘healthy
pessimism’ and downright depression. So how
can people know where to draw the line to stay
on the positive side of negativity?
‘Anticipating things that might go wrong is
actually a positive form of negative thinking.
If you’re going to do some public speaking, for
example, imagining the obstacles that lie ahead
makes you better prepared for them. It’s known
as defensive pessimism,’ says Mark Coulson, a
psychologist from Middlesex University.
And when it comes to achieving what you
want out of life, try this tip from Sussex-based
psychotherapist, Mark Maitland. ‘If you’ve got an
ambition – whether it’s to go jogging three times
a week or to set up your own business – don’t tell
anyone.’ This is particularly beneficial in the early
days of trying to achieve your goal. Mark goes on to
add: ‘There’s evidence that if you have an aspiration
and you tell people before you’ve set about doing
it, their feedback can make you lose your motivation
– because you feel like you’ve already done it.’
Psychologist, Gabriele Oettingen, has carried out
experiments that support this way of thinking.
One study looking at ‘positive fantasies about the
future’ found that spending time and energy
focusing on how well things could go, reduces
most people’s motivation to achieve them. n
Words: Jo Willacy | Photograph: Getty Images
A
re you a glass halffull person or a
glass half-empty?
Few people would
readily admit
they’re the latter.
After all, you’re always told to think
positively and look on the bright
side of life – in fact, former Monty
Python star, Eric Idle, led an 80,000
strong crowd through a rendition
of the infamous song at the 2012
Olympics Closing Ceremony.
However, trying to be positive all
the time can, ultimately, become
draining and hard work. There’s a
school of thought that argues – and
has been doing so for centuries – that
it’s the relentless effort to feel happy
and achieve certain goals, that is
precisely what makes people miserable.
And the constant efforts to ignore
the negative – feelings of insecurity,
uncertainty, failure and sadness
– are actually the exact reasons why
you often feel insecure, anxious or
unhappy in the first place.
That’s why, now, new research
suggests that not seeing everything
through rose-tinted glasses is, in fact,
better for you and future successes.
Just how has this sea-change come
about? Researchers at New York
University have been looking into
a strategy called ‘mental contrasting’
which involves thinking about the joy
and pleasure you feel in achieving
your goals but at the same time
considering any hurdles you might
have to encounter on the way. In
other words, it could be argued,
a healthy dose of realism.
066 | MARCH 2013
72-73 Glass half empty FINAL.indd 66
31/1/13 18:52:47
Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of At Home with Lorraine Kelly 2013
EDITOR'S LETTER
LORRAINE KELLY UPDATE
NEWS UPFRONT
SAVE THE DATE
READING BETWEEN THE LINES
BEAUTIES IN BLUE
LIGHTEN UP
BAGS OF STYLE
BUCKLE UP
IT'S A WRAP
IF THE SHOE FITS
SETTING TRENDS
THE BIG REVEAL
GET THE LOOK
LONG REIGN LORRAINE
MOTHER KNOWS BEST
AGE IS JUST A NUMBER
EXPECT THE WORST
UNPLANNED PREGNANCY
WOMEN'S HEALTH A-Z
COULD YOU BE DEPRESSED?
SLEEP EASY
GET BACK TO YOURSELF
WHAT A PAIN
LISTEN UP
CHINESE CUISINE
A TASTE OF ITALY
SNACK TIME
DRINK IT UP
EXCUSES, EXCUSES
EXERCISE'S NEW GROOVE
SPRING INTO SHAPE
OUT AND ABOUT
BEAUTY BLOOPERS
CROWNING GLORY
MAGIC MAKEOVERS
I LOVE MY NEW BODY'
FLASH A SMILE
YOUNG AT HEART
SAFELY DOES IT
LOOK AFTER THE PENNIES
THE GOOD LIFE
ROOM REVAMP
CLEAN UP YOUR ACT
WHAT A BLINDER!
TAKE TO THE FLOOR
HOW DOES YOUR GARDEN GROW?
OFF THE BEATEN TRACK
THE EMERALD ISLE
SPRING BREAKS
REST AND RELAXATION
ANIMAL ACCESSORIES
A MAN'S BEST FRIEND
BEASTLY BEHAVIOUR
STYLE SAVVY
TV FAVES
LAST WORD
STOCKISTS
CRAFT NEWS
WE LOVE BEING CRAFTY!'
HOME SPUN
FRAME WORK
MAKE THE CUT
CLEVER CARDS
KNIT ONE...
SPARKLE!
KITTED OUT
THE ICING ON THE CAKE
HELLO CUPCAKE
LORRAINE'S ROAD TO SUCCESS
THE WORLD OF WORK
AN AGE OLD PROFESSION
THE ONLY WAY IS UP
JUST THE JOB
MOVE OVER, MISTER!
BEYOND THE SHOP FLOOR
THE BANK JOB
ARE YOU COVERED?
CAREFULLY DOES IT
EQUAL RIGHTS
BALANCING ACT
At Home with Lorraine Kelly 2013
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/your-business-with-james-caan-spring-2024
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/yourbusiness2021
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/athomewithchrisjessen2018
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/athomewithsarahbeenyautumn2017
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/athomewithlorrainekelly2017
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/athomeparentingwithJoFrost2017
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/SarahBeenySpring2017
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AskTheDoctorWithDrJessenFebruary2017
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AtHomeWithTessDaly2016
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/Careers/YourBusinessWithJamesCaan2016
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AtHomeWithGloriaHunnifordOctober2016
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AtHomeWithSarahBeenyAutumn2016
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AtHomeWithLorraineKelly2016
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AtHomeWithJoFrostJune2016
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AtHomeWithSarahBeenySpring2016
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AtHomeWithDrChristianJessen2016
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AthomeWithTessDaly2015
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/YourBusinessWithJamesCaanAutumn2015
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AthomeWithSarahBeeny2015
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AthomeWithGloriaHunniford2015
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AtHomeLorraineKelly2015
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/JoFrost15
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/SarahBennyMay2015
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/OrthopaedicSupplementMarch2015
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/DrChristianJessenFeb2015
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/athomewithtessdaly
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/jobsandcareers2014
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/yourbusinesswithjamescaan
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/athomewithsarahbeeny
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/parentingjofrost
https://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/drchristianjessen
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/Athomelorrainekelly
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/Athomesarahbeeny
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/Cheers_2013
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Christmas_New_year_2013
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Exclusive_2013
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Jo_Frost_2013
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Carol_Vorderman_2013
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Christian_Jessen_2013
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Sarah_Beeny_2013
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Lorraine_Kelly_2013
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_James_Martin_2012
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Jo_Frost_2012
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Dr_Chris_Steele_Sept_2012
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Sally_Gunnell_2012
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Sarah_Beeny_Aug_2012
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Lorraine-Kelly_2012
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Christian_Jessen_2012
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_James_Martin_2011
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Sarah_beeny_winter_2011
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/Lorraine_Kelly_Nov_2011
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/At_Home_Marco_Pierre_White_2011
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/AtHome/Jo_Frost_July_2011
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/Lorraine_Kelly_June_2011/Lorraine_Kelly_June_2011
http://europe.nxtbook.com/emp/AtHome/Sarah_Beeny_May_2011
https://www.nxtbookmedia.com