BalanceSeptember2016 - 33
T H E SW E E T S P O T O F STRESS
months earlier. Before that, she had been
healthy and happy for her entire life. So
what had happened?
I kept checking again and again that
there wasn't something more to it, but
no. Here was the cause of Lucy's anxiety:
she had, for the first time in her life, failed
an exam. This 'failure' had floored her,
psychologically speaking. Her reaction to
such a relatively minor setback
couldn't have been further from
'what doesn't kill me, makes
me stronger' - it was more like
'what hurts me slightly has
caused me psychological
near-collapse'.
COPING STRATEGY
Peter was also a student. Like
Lucy, he had been missing
him respond to stress in the way he did?
And why did Lucy succumb to it the way
she did? After more than three decades of
research, I think I now understand why.
One reason was Lucy had never
experienced any adversity in
her life until this point - she
had been top of the class,
good-looking, popular,
stomach that many of us feel. But these
symptoms are also present in a quite
different emotion - excitement.
Research shows that we can harness this
energy by a sort of mental ju-jitsu and
saying to ourselves 'I feel excited'
rather than 'I feel anxious'.
Stress is universal; in fact,
if you don't experience
A paper published
stress from time to time,
in 1984 proved that
you probably aren't
the adult brain is
fulfilling your potential by
not 'hard wired',
stretching yourself. However,
but changed by
the
unpleasant symptoms of
experience
anxiety - with connotations of
threat and fear - can be transformed
into positive energy by shifting to a
mindset of challenge and anticipation.
Lucy was frightened of her symptoms
but she could have used them to energise
STRESS IS
UNIVERSAL;
IF YOU DON'T
EXPERIENCE
IT, YOU PROBABLY
AREN'T FULFILLING
YOUR POTENTIAL
lectures - but for a quite
different reason. Peter's mother
had died of cancer roughly six
months before we met - a similar period
of time since Lucy's failed exam.
His father, who had lost his job because
of the time he took off to care for his wife,
had not coped well with her death and was
drinking heavily. Financially, things were
very tough and Peter had needed to step in
to protect his 14-year-old sister as much as
possible from the family's misfortunes.
The tutor had been concerned that Peter
might himself be suffering psychologically
and that this was why he was not attending
some of his lectures. But it turned out that
there was a much more prosaic reason for
his absence. Peter had taken on a part-time
job to help the family.
And there was nothing wrong with Peter
mentally speaking, either. On the contrary,
the misfortune 'has turned me around',
he told me. Before his mother became sick,
Peter had been a heavy-drinking, good
-time freshman who just scraped through
his exams and assignments. He didn't have
any real interest in his studies and gave
little thought to the future. Now this had
all changed: he was focused and studying
hard. He wanted to read medicine.
Peter did admit to feeling stressed at
times, but there was a glint in his eye as
he described how he coped with the big
demands being made on him. His mother's
illness, and all the bad consequences for
his family, had certainly strengthened
him. So what was it about Peter that made
good at sports. Peter, on the other hand,
had been an average student, he wasn't
particularly popular at school and had
experienced some bullying, which he
had coped with reasonably well.
It turns out that people similar to Lucy
end up more emotionally vulnerable as
adults than those who, like Peter, have
had tough times in their lives. Too much
adversity is as bad as little, or no, adversity,
but a moderate amount toughens the
psychological immune system and makes
you emotionally resilient and better able to
cope with - and benefit from - stress.
Lucy had never really known anxiety
- the pumping heart, dry mouth, twisting
herself into passing her resit exam - which
she eventually did - if she had just learned
to magically turn them into excitement by
saying three words: 'I feel excited'. Peter
did exactly that - he used the pressure he
was under as an energiser.
Life can never be an endless round of
success and happiness - sooner or later,
there will always be some crisis.
With the right challenge mindset,
we can learn from the lobster and prove
Nietzsche right - what doesn't kill you can
make you stronger.
The Stress Test:
How Pressure Can Make
You Stronger And Sharper
by Ian Robertson
(£16.99, Bloomsbury).
Available now. B
FIND YOUR
BAL AN CE
T RAN SFOR M
ANX I ET Y I N TO
P O S I TI V I T Y
Seeing bad times as
a challenge, rather
than as a threat,
resets a number
of neurochemical
switches in our brain
that make us more
able to solve problems.
Try these tips:
Lightly
Adopt a
Action and
power pose clench your
goals
Stand or sit
Action can
right hand
trick the brain like a boss:
Try for 45
head up,
into creating
seconds on,
shoulders
the thoughts
15 seconds
straight,
and emotions
off, repeat for
occupying
that go with
a couple of
space. This
it. Setting a
minutes.
boosts
goal at the
This lifts
edge of your confidencemood and
building
comfort zone
boosts
hormones,
will give your
confidence
brain a surge and can help by changing
switch your
of moodthe balance
brain into
lifting reward
in the front
a courageous
when you
part of
mode.
achieve it.
your brain.
September 2016 BALANCE
Control
attention
A wandering
mind tends
to be an
unhappy
mind. If you
learn to
control your
attention and
focus, it can
improve your
mood and
reduce stress.
Mindfulness
is excellent
for improving
attention.
Breathe
Change
your brain
chemistry
with your
breathing.
Take a long
slow breath
in for a count
of five, then
slowly out for
a count of
six. This has
a pleasant,
tranquillising
effect and
helps you feel
calmer.
33
Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of BalanceSeptember2016
BalanceSeptember2016 - 1
BalanceSeptember2016 - 2
BalanceSeptember2016 - 3
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