At Home With Lorraine Kelly 2017 - 114
'We wish we'd seen the world'
AND HIS WIFE MARION,
FROM CUMBRIA, HAVE
ABROAD - IN THEIR 60s
'Spending time travelling around the UK and
investing in our children's hobbies took priority
- time and money-wise - during our earlier
parenthood,' says Terrance. 'Our son, Dale,
now 36, used to have weekly piano lessons and
had a football season ticket every year.
'While our daughter, Lynne, now 33, had
dance classes a couple of times a week, plus
annual competitions and medals/exams twice
a year. Costumes didn't come cheap either, and
we travelled to all her events with her, so this
took priority over holidays abroad.
'We always said "we'll go abroad one day" but
that day never came until recently. We don't
regret these decisions, but it has meant that
seeing the world has taken a back seat and we're
worried that as we're getting older, we won't be
t enough to venture far.
'In the past few years, however, while our
children have moved away, we've broadened
our horizons and visited a couple of European
countries. Later this year, we're going to New
York to watch Lynne dance on Broadway and we
can't wait. We've always wanted to visit America
so this is the start. Finally, the time is now.'
hobby 'when the kids start school'?
Parents in their 40s, 50s and even
60s can no doubt relate to this. New
mums and dads are up to their eyes in
nappies, feeds and washing, but once
little Sam starts
have the chance
to knit him some
jumpers, or begin
cra ing or that Etsy
shop they've always
wanted to set up.
Trouble is, life runs
1 Physical exercise - lack
away with them and
of energy, fear of pain.
'when he starts
2 Working or studying
- boredom, unsure of task
'when he goes to
in hand, overwhelming.
school' then 'when
3 Confronting people
hes e ho e.
- worried about outcome
and fear of rejection.
comes, and the art
4 andling finances
- fear of failure and
is more common
facing the truth (if it's
things we put
o and hy
a bad outcome).
5 Making important
decisions - fear of failure
or upsetting someone.
114 | AUGUST 2017
de nition o
procrastination is 'the action of
delaying or postponing something'.
It's avoidance behaviour, says
consultant psychologist Dr Michael
Sinclair. 'It's a human reaction to
avoid doing stuff we don t want to
do to avoid otentia y di cu t
situations. ts a about our con dence
and the fear it won't go well and we
won't be good enough.'
oba y one in ve eo e
describes themselves as chronic
procrastinators** and, it seems,
women are the worst culprits.
here are three different ty es
of procrastinators - thrill seekers,
avoiders and decisional procrastinators.
Everyone with avoidance tactics falls
into one of these categories.
Thrill seekers get a rush from
completing things at the last minute.
They thrive under pressure and
crave the adrenaline they get when
they hand in work at the last minute.
The trouble with this, of course,
is they may not reach their full
potential as they spend the bare
minimum time on projects.
Avoiders, those who have fear of
ai ure or success ut off doing
activities or tasks because they are
too concerned about what others
may think. They would rather come
across as acking effort than abi ity.
Finding something else to distract
themselves with allows them to
escape a certain emotion, which is
usually worry, anxiety or panic.
Decisional procrastinators are
perfectionists who can't make
a decision and there ore shi
responsibility from themselves
for the outcome of events.
Contrary to popular belief, the
causes of procrastination aren't
down to laziness or disorganisation.
It tends to stem from deeper
psychological issues, for example,
WORDS: LYNNE MAXWELL, IMAGES: GETTY IMAGES,
SOURCES: *YOUGOV SURVEY OF 2,000 ADULTS,
'IT'S A HUMAN REACTION TO AVOID DOING
STUFF WE DON'T WANT TO DO, TO AVOID
POTENTIALLY DIFFICULT SITUATIONS'